Me 13st 13lb

Me 13st 13lb
August 2009 very unflattering picture as day 3 of camping...messy hair and no make up but good picture in the respect that I'm not hiding behind somebody or breathing in lol!

Friday, 30 April 2010

Don't know what to do!?

Nothing to do with WW or WI's or NSV's or SP's

Oh dear, at a time that I really wish my Mum could help me I'm afraid that her "Old School" attitude to childrens upbringings may cause another row. I have a problem with Bill :'( he has been so sad...and I mean like genuinely sad since waking up to a bad dream on Wednesday night/early Thursday morning. He dreamt that he was drowning...he's 4 years old!? How does he even know what that is!? I don't remember telling him nor does Matt. Trouble is he's so clever and quite often i'm guilty of forgetting that he's not the little old man he sounds like sometimes and he is just a baby, and I can go into quite graphic detail when explaining things when I should just try and change the subject - just the other day we had a massive conversation on the environment and climate change! :0/ So now i'm trying to think back to if we've ever had a conversation about drowning and I'm terrified I've told him what it is and planted this seed in his little mind :'(

Anyway it's really done something to him, he's tearful and when I give him a cuddle and ask him what's wrong he just keeps saying that his dream keeps popping into his head and he's scared. I know him inside out...he's my son and I know when he's milking something for a bit of attention and when he's genuinely upset and it's breaking my heart...I don't know what to do.

At the moment he's saying a) He never wants to sleep again as he's scared he'll have the dream again - he already has a dream catcher so we've given it a magic shake and moved it closer to him in a hope that helps, obviously I know as an adult this won't do anything but he really thinks it will :) bless him! and b) that he never wants to go swimming again as he's so scared of drowning...I don't want to push him but I don't want this to become some sort of phobia?

I really feel for the first time that i'm letting him down...I really don't know what to do, sitting here in tears typing this! Daft mare! He has alot going on at the moment, starting "Big School" in September - although he says he's excited about this I can imagine that it can be quite worrying, he's very sensitive and I know he's a little thinker so not sure if that's causing this? I honestly can not bare to see his little lip quiver and his voice break as he tries to be brave and not cry when we're talking. I'm not sure where this not wanting to cry has come from either.

I know if I ask my Mum she's gonna say something ridiculous but me sitting here getting in a state is just as ridiculous! He was up in the night a few times last night and I sat with him and just whispered to him that Mummy was there and I'd never let anything happen to him etc and we spent the whole of yesterday talking about how he never has to worry etc etc but I can see something is still not sitting right with him.

Sorry for this - just don't know who to ask....I want to be super Mum and I'm not :'( trying so so hard.....please help me xxx


  1. awww bless him. I think you are doing all the right things. Give it a little time to calm down and reinforce that dreams are not real.

  2. Hi Kit,

    Can't thank you enough for your reply :) I did reply earlier but it seems to have disappeared :( your comment was much appreciated.

    Think we all have times when we doubt our abilities and that was definitely a bad day for me as a Mum lol. Well it's true what they say, you don't get given a handbook when you have kids and alot of how it turns out is down to trial and error, Bill seems to be loads better now...still getting up once or twice in the night but nothing major, so I'm hoping it was just a one off :)

    Thank you again so much xx Lauren xx

  3. I'm glad he is doing better.